Posts by SilkeCelia

Self-Care As A Leader

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Silke, I can’t concentrate well! I take so much longer to structure my thoughts!” “I feel depleted of energy!” “I feel disconnected!”

The first question I normally ask my clients is: Did You SNEASE?

Let me show you my daily snease routine.

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1. Sleep

Get enough sleep. I have a daily routine of going to bed before midnight and wake up at 7 am. The brain needs enough time to restore memories, rejuvenate brain cells and flush out toxins.

2. Nutrition

Eat good Nutrition. After sleep the brain graves for fuel in form of glucose. My morning smoothie consists of fresh fruits (papaya and banana), whole grain oats, a scope of protein powder blended with coconut milk.

My lunch and dinner consists of good proteins (mainly fish, eggs and tofu), starchy carbohydrates (sweet potatoes, green bananas, brown rice) and lots of fresh vegetables.

In between I have some walnuts, apple, cottage cheese or kefir.

3. Emotional Control

Control your Emotions. During brain activities of writing and blogging I keep a brain focus app to indicate break times (for me 45 minutes brain focus and 8- 10 min break work best for me). During my “focus” time I keep away from social notifications.

I try to go for a short walk after lunch to activate my body.

Whenever I catch myself in negative thoughts or feelings I practice mindfulness of accepting and moving on.

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4. Activity

Be Active. I work out at least three times a week - ranging from strength to flexibility training. Whenever I get a chance I walk at least 30 minutes a day.

I have a work schedule from 9 am - to 5 pm (even as an entrepreneur) and if I have not finished my tasks, I write them all down on notepads to come back to them the next day.

My coaching sessions count as elevated time for me.

At 7 pm I take another hour to attend to social media posts while my food is cooking in the background. For me cutting the vegetables and smelling the food is mindfulness practice.

5. Social

Be Social. I try to book one or two meetings with close friends every week to create meaning outside my work and to recharge my sense of belonging.

6. Enthusiasm

Ensure you have a mission. I try to align my work to a higher mission to elevate people to reach their fullest self. Knowing that I can live that mission in many ways, comforts me in times when things do not work out the way I planned.

 

Summary

SNEASE is a good structure to create your own SELF-CARE Program.

How do you care for yourself?

Share your ideas in the comments.

 

Interested?  Let’s work together.

Consider how you came to be in this situation. Do you need to make some changes at work, a different job, or a more satisfying relationship? Could it help you to speak to a professional? What needs to happen to prevent the same situation from happening again?

My goal as an executive coach is to provide rapid and long-lasting changes for professionals who go through life changes or challenging situations resulting in burnout, stress and anxiety. No matter where you are in the world, the therapy sessions are held online. 4-Hours of my Elevate Intensive and you will improve the quality of your life, switch your body back to peace and balance, and gain clarity and focus.

I hold a master’s degree in psychology with an over 15-years career in counseling and coaching. I trained with a broad range of international experts like the world-renowned therapist and pioneering hypnotherapist Marisa Peer (Rapid Transformation Therapy Practitioner®), Rori Raye (Relationship Coaching), and Prof. Dr. Justin Kennedy (Applied Neuroscience Coaching).

Contact me today to learn how I can help make things better!  www.silkcelia.com

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The Complete Guide For Anxiety and Worry At Work

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Do you worry a lot? Many people operate under the fallacy that worrying is productive. However, our worries have no impact on the rest of the world. No one has ever worried away bad weather or a faulty automobile transmission. As much as we like to think that all the time and energy we put into worrying is helpful, it’s not.

Anxiety is a major cause of many emotional and physical ailments. Anxiety and worry are a major cause of unhappiness and poor health. Anxiety is also incredibly common. Everyone worries from time to time.

Thankfully, anxiety and worry are under our control. You can stop worrying whenever you truly decide to put an end to it.

 

"Worry is a thin stream of fear trickling through the mind.
If encouraged, it cuts a channel into which all other thoughts are drained.”

- Arthur Somers Roche

 

1. What is Anxiety

 

According to the dictionary, anxiety is a feeling of worry, nervousness, or unease, typically about an imminent event or something with an uncertain outcome. It’s your body’s reaction to stress.

Everyone knows what anxiety feels like. It’s that feeling in the pit of your stomach on the first day of school. It’s also the feeling you get when you know you have to give a speech in an hour.

We can think of anxiety as an overall state combining fear, worry, and uncertainty. It’s physical and emotional. It’s often a reaction to something that hasn’t happened yet and may never happen. It’s largely anticipatory.

While anxiety is most often focused on a particular event, it is possible to have anxiety in a more general sense. These are often classified as anxiety disorders.

2. Symptoms and risks of anxiety

 

Anxiety is hard on your mind and body. While anxiety is occasionally a good thing when it saves your life or prevents you from doing something overly risky, it causes more harm than good in most cases.

 

Chronic anxiety can cause a host of physical and emotional symptoms, including:

 

  • Fatigue
  • Rapid heart rate
  • High blood pressure
  • Inability to concentrate
  • Hyperventilation
  • Insomnia
  • Shortness of breath
  • Headaches
  • Dizziness
  • Panic attacks
  • Anxiety disorders
  • Sweating

Long-term risks include:

  • Immune system suppression. This can lead to a variety of illnesses from the common cold, to the flu, or even cancer.
  • Digestive disorders
  • Heart disease

 

Anxiety has a wide variety of negative effects on the mind and body. Anxiety also limits your life in many ways. It can stifle your career and social life. It also limits your enjoyment.

Think about how much different your life would look if you never worried. This might seem like a silly idea, but it’s not. You might have to grow older, but there’s no rule that says you have to be anxious.

 

"There is only one way to happiness and that is to cease worrying about things
which are beyond the power of our will.”

- Epictetus

 

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3. Simple Self Help For Anxiety

 

There are many ways to approach anxiety. The simplest methods are also the best. While we’ll explore more involved ways to ease anxiety, try giving a few simple methods a chance. You might get the relief you need without a lot effort.

 

Use these strategies to worry less:

 

Ask yourself what you can do about it. There are many worries that are beyond your ability to influence. If you can do something about your concern, by all means, do it. However, many of our worrisome situations can’t be solved. A few examples include:

    • Health issues of a family member
    • The weather for the family reunion on Saturday
    • Whether or not you’ll get that promotion or raise on Monday
    • Whether or not someone likes you
    • Whether or not your child had a good day at school today
    • Politics
    • Your sports team’s performance
    • The list is endless. You have less influence on your environment than you think. Remind yourself that worrying about these types of items is pointless.

 

Get more rest. A lack of sleep only makes anxiety issues worse. Your body produces many of the same chemicals while fatigued as it does when you’re stressed. The conditions are very similar.

      • An extra hour of sleep each night can make a big difference. A nap can be helpful, too.

 

Find something else to do. If worry and anxiety are getting the best of you, try distracting yourself. You might think, “That’s not going to solve anything.” True, but neither is worrying. You may as well enjoy yourself as much as possible in the meantime.

 

Adopt powerful body language. Strong, powerful body language can change your mood and attitude. Try standing like a powerful person that has control over his life.

    • Head up
    • Stand or sit up straight
    • Chest out
    • Slight smile
    • Take up space
    • Have a strong handshake
    • Relaxed
    • Good eye contact
    • Watch a few movies with powerful, confident characters and notice how they stand and move

 

Laugh. You have a couple of memories or stories that always make you laugh when you think about them or share them. Have these memories ready to go at a moment’s notice.

    • Who is the funniest person you know? Spend more time with them when you’re feeling stressed.
    • What tv shows or movies always make you laugh? Do you have access to them? Are there any YouTube videos you find funny? Save them them so you have access to them at any time.
    • Who are your favorite comedians?

 

Limit your worrying to a set amount of time. Does worrying make you feel a little better? Okay, worry away. But, you can only worry for 30 minutes! Plan your worrying time in advance. Put it on your calendar and really work up to it. Set a timer and have at it.

    • Ensure that you don’t worry until your designated time. If you start worrying before, catch yourself and say, “I’ll worry tomorrow at 5PM. It’s on my calendar!”

 

Avoid assumptions. Many of our problems, fears, and worries are the result of assumptions. Why assume that things are going to go poorly? Why not just assume things will go well? Neither will affect the outcome, but you’ll enjoy your life more if you have positive expectations.

    • Assumptions can also cause anxiety in other ways. We assume that someone doesn’t like us. Or we assume that we’ll never find a better job. We assume that nothing we try will work, so why try at all?
    • Rather than make assumptions, why not give yourself a chance and see what actually happens?

 

Be willing to say no. Worry, stress, and anxiety are the common result of an inability to refuse requests. We over promise and over commit. We often even commit to doing things that violate our values and personal priorities.

    • When you can say no, you’re setting boundaries that protect your time, energy, and sanity. Be honest and tell people that you don’t have the time.

 

Make a plan for the worst. It can be helpful to imagine the worst possible outcome and prepare for it.

    • The worst possible outcome likely won’t happen, but if you have a plan to deal with it, you can relax. You’re already covered.

 

Accept that worry is just an uncomfortable feeling in your body. Like all emotions, anxiety and worry are physical sensations that you experience. You don’t have to change your life plans or avoid certain activities because you have a mosquito bite on your arm. You wouldn’t allow that to stop you from doing anything.

    • You can choose to just allow your anxiety to exist and move forward anyway.

 

While meditation, mindfulness training, and changing your view of the world are powerful techniques, a few, quick simple solutions might be enough to take the edge off your excessive worrying. Never discount simple techniques without giving them a trial run. You could save yourself a lot of time.

 

"He is rich who owns the day, and no one owns the day
who allows it to be invaded with fret and anxiety.”

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

 

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4. Physical remedies for anxiety and worry 

 

There are two general approaches to dealing with worry and anxiety: A physical approach and a psychological approach. Both are worth investigating. Perhaps one approach will be enough to provide the relief you desire. In most cases, using both will bring the best results.

Physical methods are mostly lifestyle changes. These changes are also beneficial to your overall health and well-being. It won’t just be your anxious mind that benefits. There are many physical benefits as well.

 

Diet

 

This might be more specific for you than just eating your veggies and avoiding ice cream. There are people that have been able to stop taking anxiety medication just by dropping gluten from their diet. You can’t be sure what the best diet is for you until you experiment. Your diet has a huge impact on your physical and mental health.

 

Some likely culprits that can contribute to anxiety or general discomfort include:

 

  • Dairy
  • Gluten
  • Processed meats, such as bacon and sausage
  • Artificial colors and flavorings
  • Caffeine
  • Nuts
  • Even egg whites cause a rapid heart rate in some people

Some people have no problems with these foods, while others have problems with all of them. It’s likely there is at least one item on this list that negatively affects you.

 

Build a healthy diet just for you from scratch:

 

Start with an extremely healthy diet. Start with the healthiest diet you can stand for a few days. You probably won’t have to maintain this diet for long, but you could! Here’s a list of foods you can eat:

    • Any fruit, vegetable, legume, or organic meat
    • Water
    • That’s it. In case you’re wondering, legumes are beans, lentils, peas, and peanuts. But skip the peanuts.

 

Eat this way for a week. No cheating allowed. After a week, notice how you feel. If you feel much better, you should be very excited! If you feel the same, your old diet probably isn’t causing you any stress or anxiety.

 

Start adding back in the foods you think you can’t live without. Each morning, you’re going to test one food with the following procedure.

    • Sit quietly for a minute with the food in front of you. Rate how you feel physically and psychologically on a scale of 1 to 10.
    • Take your pulse. If you have a blood pressure monitor, you can use that, too. Record your pulse.
    • Eat the food slowly with a small glass of water. Avoid any other foods at this time. This should be the first thing you’ve eaten for the day. Only test one food each day.
    • After finishing the food, take your pulse again. If it has risen more than 10 beats from your starting measurement, that food may be causing it.
    • Rate how you feel again. If you feel worse, stay away from that food. If you feel the same, you can continue eating it.

 

Over time, you can test every food that appeals to you. Remember to check any sauces and salad dressings that you like to eat. These are often an issue for many people. Beverages, too!

 

Diet matters. Most people vastly underestimate the impact diet has on their physical and emotional health. Consider that you’re putting food into your body. It’s then broken down and travels through your bloodstream. Of course, the food you eat is going to have a huge effect on how you feel.

In some cases, this one item can be enough to change your life dramatically. Give this strategy a fair chance.

 

"The truth is that there is no actual stress or anxiety in the world;
it's your thoughts that create these false beliefs.
You can't package stress, touch it, or see it.
There are only people engaged in stressful thinking.”

- Wayne Dyer

 

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Exercise

 

You already know that exercise is good for you. But exercise is easy to put off to another day. You might feel that you’re too stressed or busy for exercise, but exercise might be exactly what you need to reduce your stress. Exercise can be a simple way to reduce anxiety and make you more worry-resistant.

 

Exercise provides stress-defeating benefits, including:

 

Exercise destroys many of the chemicals your body releases when you’re stressed. You’re removing part of the cause for your stressed feelings when you exercise.

 

Exercise releases endorphins. These neurotransmitters make you feel good. Any vigorous exercise can release endorphins. They’re strong enough to create an addiction to exercise.

 

It focuses your mind on something other than your worries. When you have a tennis ball flying at you at 80 miles per hour, your mind is focused on the game. You’re not worrying about your unpaid parking tickets or the fact that your boss yelled at you.

    • Moving your body is a great way to make your mind more focused on the present moment.
    • Even going for a leisurely walk can be beneficial. This, along with controlling your body, can distract your mind from your challenges.

 

Find exercise that you love. It’s easier to exercise when you enjoy it. Find something you love to do and build it into your schedule.

 

How much exercise do you need to feel better? Experiment and determine the amount that works best for you. Some people do quite well with short 10-minute walks. Others need to really work up a sweat. Stay within your current capabilities but give both styles of exercise a try and find what works for you.

 

"Amusement is appealing because
we don't have to think; it spares us the fear and anxiety
that might otherwise
prey on our thoughts.”

- John Ortberg

 

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Sleep

 

You’re busy, so you might think you don’t have time to get more sleep. But, it’s important to remember that sleep is good for your health. A lack of sleep can be a significant source of physical stress. Then you feel awful physically which leads to feeling awful emotionally.

 

Sleep is one of the best ways to keep anxiety and worry away from your doorstep:

 

It’s about quality and quantity. The magic number from numerous studies is seven hours of sleep. You might think you only need six hours but give seven a chance and notice how you feel.

    • But not all hours of sleep are created equal. If you toss and turn all night, ten hours might be insufficient.

 

Create a good sleeping environment. You wouldn’t choose to sleep on a concrete driveway in the middle of a 90-degree day. Sleeping in a hot room on an old, squishy, lumpy mattress isn’t ideal either.

    • Dark and quiet is ideal for most people.
    • Find the right mattress and pillow.
    • Find your ideal temperature. Experiment.
    • Avoid using the bedroom for anything other than sleep and sex.
    • Get rid of the TV.
    • No working in the bedroom!
    • Keep your cell phone away from the immediate area.

 

Set a regular sleep schedule. College students might be able to get away with constantly changing sleep schedules, but those days are over. Do everything you can to stick to a regular schedule.

 

Nap, but be careful. A regular nap can be a great way to get more sleep. Experiment with the right length of time. Naps that are too long can leave you feeling groggy and disoriented.

    • Occasional napping can potentially be a good thing. If you’re making up for missed sleep, the occasional nap can be useful. But, occasional napping can also throw off your sleep routine. A nap in the afternoon might make it hard to fall asleep at night.

 

Use light to your advantage. You’ll wake up more readily in the morning if you expose yourself to sunlight in the morning. There are even artificial lights that mimic the sunlight you can use in the winter.

    • Limit your exposure to bright electronic screens in the evening. Too much light keeps your brain too active and awake.

 

Avoid TV at night. Between the bright screen and the stimulating content, watching television can make it harder to sleep at night. Listening to music or to a book on tape can be better options if sleep is a priority.

 

Exercise can help you sleep. Avoid exercising within four hours of your bedtime if possible. Some people sleep quite well shortly after exercising. You can’t be sure how you’ll respond without experimenting.

    • Exercising too hard or for too long can have a negative impact on sleep. In fact, one of the signs of overtraining is insomnia!

 

Try counting sheep. It works! Anything that requires visualization and using the logic center of your brain can help to induce sleep. Visualize anything you like and count.

    • Another option is to pay close attention to your breath and count. Count each exhalation. You might start at 1,000 and count backwards. See how far you can get until your mind wanders away. Return to where you left off and keep counting.

 

Sleep isn’t the most exciting topic, and it might seem too passive to help you deal with the stressors in your life. However, proper sleep makes you more capable physically and emotionally. You can’t think of many things you do better while tired. Get enough sleep to tackle your worries with energy to spare.

 

"We all have anxiety about things. We all have little insecurities,
but eventually you have to face your fears if you want to be successful,
and everybody has some fear of failure.”

- Nick Saban

 

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Relaxation Techniques

 

There are a variety of relaxation techniques you can use to reduce the level of stress in your body. The best news is that all of these techniques feel incredible. There are countless options depending on your budget and available time. Enjoy!

 

Enjoy yourself while relaxing your body and mind with these techniques:

 

Progressive muscle relaxation. It’s best to do this lying down, but sitting, and even standing, are acceptable. You will start at your feet and move all the way up to your face. You flex and relax each part of your body. When that body part feels relaxed, move to the next.

    • Common areas include: feet, calves, thighs, buttocks, abdominal muscles, hands, forearms, upper arms, shoulders, back, neck and face.
    • Really focus on relaxing each body part completely.

 

Hot tub. A hot shower or bath can work well, too. Lounge in the warm water and do your best to relax. Combine this technique with progressive relaxation for an even stronger effect.

Massage. You’ll need a few dollars or a friend for this one. If you’ve never had a massage before, you’ll be stunned by how relaxed you feel afterwards. There are many types of massages. Give them all a try.

 

These are just a few ideas to get you started. There are entire industries dedicated to helping you relax and relieve your stress. Experiment and determine the most effective options for you.

 

Give your diet, sleep, and exercise a long, hard look. These things are beneficial to your health as well as dealing with anxiety and worry. These lifestyle items affect all parts of your life.

 

"If you believe that feeling bad or worrying long enough
will change a past or future event,
then you are residing on another planet
with a different reality system.”

- William James

 

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5. Thoughtful Anxiety Relief

 

Stress, worry, and anxiety often have external triggers, but the actual emotions and physical sensations are entirely self-induced. You can’t see anxiety. You can only experience it yourself or see other people going through it. It’s not growing on a tree or floating through the air.

The way you view life and the challenges you face determines whether or not you’ll be anxious when faced with a potential difficulty.

For example, if you think it’s important to never feel embarrassed or to make a fool out of yourself, you’re going to be more anxious than someone that doesn’t hold these beliefs.

Consider how much of a load the average person has put on their brain in order to protect the psyche. They’ve given it a huge job to do. For example:

 

  • We want to always be happy.
  • Of course, we never want to feel embarrassed or psychologically uncomfortable.
  • We want everyone to like us.
  • We want to ensure we never fail.
  • Our brain has to maneuver around every past hurt and concern we’ve ever had.

 

Protecting the psyche is a huge job, and it’s no wonder why so many people are anxious. A brain that has to deal with all of this can never be 100% emotionally healthy.

A healthy perspective on life and challenges can heal anxiety from the inside out.

 

Consider these anxiety relief ideas:

 

Remember that life is short. Imagine you only had a month left to live. How many of your current worries would still bother you? Your perspective changes at the end of your life, but that doesn’t mean you can’t make changes now.

    • How will you view your life toward the end of your lifetime?

 

Realize that others aren’t really paying attention. The vast majority of our concerns are regarding the opinions of others. Most of us don’t worry about starving to death. We worry about how we look in our old, rusty car.

    • There’s good news, though. Few people really care. They’re too concerned with other things to be judging. They don’t care if you fail or whether you’re a few pounds overweight.
    • The people that do care are on your side anyway.

 

Understand that few of your worries will actually come true. You spend a lot of time worrying about things that never happen. One study showed that 85% of worries didn’t happen. Of the 15% that did occur, 79% of the study subjects stated the problem was easier to deal with than they expected.

    • A little math (21% of 15%) shows that something “bad” only happens 3.15% of the time when you expect it to happen.

 

Avoid taking things personally. So many things are outside of your control, including the attitudes and perceptions of others, that there’s no reason to take life personally. If you can remove yourself and your ego from the equation, there’s not much else left to worry about.

 

Time spent worrying is lost forever. You don’t worry about time when you’re younger. At some point, time is all that matters. You’re going to kick yourself later for the time you lost to worry. Worrying is akin to taking time and flushing it down the toilet.

 

Develop a new perspective on life. You have the right to view the world any way you want. Create a personal manifesto and live by it. Every person needs a code to follow, or life becomes too complicated.

 

You might decide that:

 

  • Life is a game full of challenges to solve.
  • The purpose of life is spiritual growth.
  • You want to learn to be free of the opinions of others.

 

Create a perspective on life that serves you and either reduces your anxiety or makes good use of it.

 

"If a problem is fixable, if a situation is such
that you can do something about it, then there is no need
to worry. If it's not fixable, then there is no help in worrying.
There is no benefit in worrying
whatsoever.”   

- Dalai Lama XIV

 

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6. Anxiety and Meditation

 

Everyone talks about mediation these days, but it’s been around for thousands of years. It’s a useful tool that many find reduces anxiety and adds enjoyment to their lives. It’s also one of the best ways to learn how your individual brain works.

You learn a lot by sitting still and observing your thoughts and tendencies. You learn that you are completely separate from your thoughts and urges. You’re just observing them. They don’t have to be acted upon.

Meditation quiets the mind and allows you to experience the world free of your opinions and beliefs. Many proponents of meditation believe that our natural state is one of happiness, but our perceptions and beliefs are faulty and get in the way of happiness.

While there are meditation retreats, camps, and expert instructors available for hire, you can learn enough on your own to be thrilled with the results. Remember that books and free videos are available, too.

 

Use meditation as a tool to reduce anxiety and worry, like this:

 

Find a quiet and comfortable place to sit. It can be a couch, chair, or pillow on the floor. What’s important is that you be comfortable. Staying motionless is important.

    • Something firm is more comfortable after a few minutes than something soft.

 

Start by focusing on your breath. Just notice and feel the air moving past your nose or lips. Feel your chest expanding and collapsing. Do your best to stay with your breath.

    • Eventually, your mind will wander. It might not take long, but the length of time will increase with practice.

 

Return your attention to your breath for the first week. For now, just catch yourself when you start daydreaming or thinking about anything other than your breath. Return your focus to the breath.

 

After a week, stay with the thought for a few minutes. Observe the thought without engaging with it. You’ll know you’re doing it wrong if you become emotional in any way. Just notice the thought and sit with it. It will fade on its own if you keep your distance. Then, return to your breath.

 

Start with five minutes but extend the time to at least 30 minutes. Meditation is more work than you think. Be gentle with yourself and start slowly. Increase the time over the coming weeks.

That’s it! It can be that simple to greatly reduce your anxiety and tendency to worry. Mastering meditation can take years, but you don’t need to be an expert to enjoy great benefits from meditation. Be patient. It’s not as easy to sit for 30 minutes as you think.

 

There are several challenges that all meditators face from time to time, including:

 

Losing focus. Beginning meditators lose focus easily and don’t even realize it until several minutes have passed. We’re so used to daydreaming that we fall into that old routine.

    • This is nothing to worry about. Catch yourself as soon in the process as possible and return to your breath.
    • It’s challenging to keep your focus for even 30 seconds at first. You have to train your mind to focus for longer. Just keep at it.

 

Becoming too involved with thoughts. Your meditation is going well, then you start thinking about your ex and your emotions are off and running. You think about how much you miss him or about how great she used to smell. Next thing you know, you’re mad, sad, or lonely.

    • View your thoughts like a movie you’re not that interested in. They’re just things to observe for the time being.

 

Physical discomfort. No matter how many times you try, you’ll never find a sitting position that’s completely pain-free for more than a few minutes. That’s okay.

    • Resist the urge to move. The relief you gain is only temporary. You’ll just induce a new pain three minutes later.
    • Use your pain as fuel for your meditation. Observe your pain without becoming emotionally involved. In time, it will pass.

 

Meditation can be boring. Think about just sitting there and watching your breath for an hour. Watching paint dry can be more exciting. Again, just observe your boredom and breathe.

 

Meditation isn’t without its challenges! You can learn to meditate well enough on your own to experience great results if you’re willing to put in the time and effort. Meditation has survived for over 3,500 hundred years according to written records. There’s a reason it’s still around and more popular than ever.

 

"Happy is the man who has broken the chains which hurt the mind,
and has given up worrying once and for all.”

- Ovid

 

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7. Anxiety and Mindfulness

 

A large component of meditation is mindfulness. But you can also be mindful during your regular activities. If you train yourself to be mindful, you’ll even be mindful during your dreams.

Mindfulness is simply keeping your awareness on the present moment while accepting any thoughts, emotions, and physical sensations that are present.

In a nutshell, if you’re washing the dishes, your mind is on the task of cleaning the dishes. You’re also aware of the warmth and wetness of the water. You’re not thinking about your bills or the fact that your car is leaking antifreeze.

When you’re mindful, you’re not overly reactive or bothered by what’s happening around you. This isn’t because you’re unaware, but rather because you’re accepting of it. You take on the role of an observer.

You can think of mindfulness as meditating on a task or your environment, rather than allowing your mind to wander off. Can you see how difficult it would be to worry or feel anxiety if you were mindful 100% of the time?

 

Try these ways to be more mindful in your daily life:

 

Give yourself a reality check by being hyper-aware of your environment. This is a great way to bring yourself back to the present moment when your mind is running wild. Ask yourself the following questions:

  • What do I see? Describe what you see. For example, “I see a brown, wooden chair with a black padded seat. It has a design of a flower on the back. Describe at least five things you see.
  • What do I hear? Repeat the above process with all of these questions:
  • What do I feel?
  • What do I smell?
  • What do I taste?

 

Sit outside and observe. See if you can keep your attention on what you experience with your senses, without thinking about anything.

    • You don’t need to tell yourself that you see a tree. After all, It’s right in front of you. Just observe and keep your mind as quiet as possible.
    • This can be one of the most relaxing things you can do for your mind. It’s a great way to take a break and teach yourself to be mindful.
    • This is also an incredibly safe way to drive a car!

 

Always maintain at least a slight awareness of your breathing. Think of your attachment to your breath like a thin thread. It’s not at the forefront of your attention while you’re having a conversation, but it’s always there nonetheless.

    • What makes your breath so important is the fact that it’s always with you. You take it everywhere you go and it’s always happening right now. It’s the perfect anchor to the present.

 

Keep your thoughts on what you’re doing. Whether you’re taking a shower, eating a burger, or taking out the trash, keep your mind on your current activity. Live your life this way and your anxiety will evaporate.

 

Only think about the future and the past sparingly. There’s little to be gained by thinking about the past or the future.

    • The past is only useful for learning. Once you’ve gained the lesson to be learned, come back to the present.
    • Thinking about the future is only useful for planning. Plan your lunch, vacation, or life, but return to the present moment when your planning is done.
    • Set aside time to think about the past and future. Have an agenda and stick to it.

 

Notice how your thoughts rise and fall. No matter how hard you try, your mind will wander. Observe how thoughts drift away without you having to do anything. They’re like clouds floating by. It doesn’t take long for them to fade.

 

Try using mindfulness to improve your diet. How do we cave in to eating unhealthy foods? We first think about eating the food. Then we get emotionally involved with the idea of how great the food tastes and how good it’s going to make us feel. The next thing you know, you’re charging the pantry like a mindless fool.

    • Try this next time: When you catch yourself craving that bag of chips, be a casual observer of the sensations and emotions you’re feeling. You might say to yourself, “My mouth is watering, and I’m getting a warm feeling all over my body. I can already taste the saltiness and feel the crunch of the chips.”
    • Describe it like you’re an impartial scientist doing a study. Focus on those thoughts and feelings. They will go away. Now, you can make a better food choice or find something else to do altogether.

 

Notice when you tend to space out. It might be chores or answering emails. When does your mind tend to wander? Pay particular attention at those times and stay mindful.

 

Mindfulness can be applied during any emotionally charged occasion. When you’re angry, sad, or frustrated, you can use mindfulness to move beyond those emotions and make good choices.

Mindfulness creates space for making intelligent decisions based on your knowledge and experience. You can’t be wise when reacting to a situation with your emotions raging.

It’s also a way to soothe your emotions, including worry and anxiety.

 

"My life has been full of terrible misfortunes
most of which never happened.”

- Michel de Montaigne

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8. Managing Anxiety at Work and Other Specific Locations

 

Most of us spend the vast majority of our time either at work or at home. While you now know several tools for dealing with anxiety, each environment is unique. And it’s not just at home or work. You might have high levels of anxiety in social situations.

Let’s examine how we can tailor your approach to a specific environment.

 

Use these techniques to customize your anxiety tools to your work environment:

 

Understand your triggers at work. It can be particular situations or people. Maybe you’re stressed by a messy desk or by speaking with a certain person. Maybe eating lunch in the work cafeteria frazzles your nerves.

    • Make a list of the people and situations that cause you stress, anxiety, or worry.

 

Plan ahead. If you know the things that upset you, you can make adjustments and ease your mind.

    • If a messy desk is too much to handle, clean and organize your desk at the end of each day.
    • If a particular person drives you nuts, avoid speaking to them as much as possible. Maybe you can move to a different cubicle or communicate as much as possible via email.
    • Hate the cafeteria scene? Bring your lunch and eat at your desk or get away for an hour.

 

Have strategies in place for how you will handle any anxiety you do experience. Maybe you have enough privacy to meditate at work in your office. Maybe you can hide in the bathroom for a few minutes and meditate.

    • You might listen to peaceful music with earbuds.
    • You could remember to focus on your breathing.
    • You could focus on your surroundings and become as present as possible.

 

Remind yourself of how much your job does for you. It allows you to feed yourself and your children, put a roof over your head, and enjoy your life. All of those things can be worth a little aggravation.

Apply these same ideas to the other areas of your life. Work is often the trickiest area because we have the least freedom there. If you can manage work, you should be able to find solutions for the other areas of your life.

  • There are more rules regarding your conduct at work than in most other places.
  • You don’t get to choose all of your coworkers.
  • You need a job to survive.

 

At home, you have more influence over your environment. You also have far more options available to you. Deal with each area of your life individually to maximize the effectiveness of your anti-anxiety strategies.

 

"A mistake in judgment isn't fatal,
but too much anxiety about judgment is.”

- Pauline Kael

 

9. Conclusion

 

Anxiety, worry, stress, and the turmoil they create is damaging to both your physical and emotional health. A plethora of physical ailments are caused or exacerbated by anxiety. Worrying about the future also detracts from the ability to enjoy life. It’s challenging to enjoy life while in a state of worry.

We often think that worrying is helpful in some way, but it’s just a huge waste of energy, time, and happiness.

There are physical and psychological methods of dealing with anxiety and worry. Diet, sleep, exercise, and relaxation techniques can be effective ways to combat anxiety physically.

Psychological techniques include meditation, perspective, and mindfulness.

Do you need additional assistance?

Click on this link >> to book a call with me and find out how you can leave burnout, anxiety and stress behind and increase your well being and success.

 

 

Enjoy your life more by dealing with your anxiety and worry, starting today!

 

Interested?  Let’s work together.

Consider how you came to be in this situation. Do you need to make some changes at work, a different job, or a more satisfying relationship? Could it help you to speak to a professional? What needs to happen to prevent the same situation from happening again?

My goal as an executive coach is to provide rapid and long-lasting changes for professionals who go through life changes or challenging situations resulting in burnout, stress and anxiety. No matter where you are in the world, the therapy sessions are held online. 4-Hours of my Elevate Intensive and you will improve the quality of your life, switch your body back to peace and balance, and gain clarity and focus.

I hold a master’s degree in psychology with an over 15-years career in counseling and coaching. I trained with a broad range of international experts like the world-renowned therapist and pioneering hypnotherapist Marisa Peer (Rapid Transformation Therapy Practitioner®), Rori Raye (Relationship Coaching), and Prof. Dr. Justin Kennedy (Applied Neuroscience Coaching).

Contact me today to learn how I can help make things better!  www.silkcelia.com

Like What Your Read? 

Register below and receive monthly advice!

Yes, sign me up for monthly newsletter emails from Silk Celia with highlights of her blog and vlog. For more information on how we use your information, check out our Privacy Policy. You can change your mind anytime by unsubscribing.

Workplace Burnout: 3 Reliable Ways On How To Overcome The Mayor Signs

SilkCelia-3 Ways To Overcome Burnout

Burnout is an occupational phenomenon – not an illness or health condition. The 11th revision of the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11) defines burn-out “as a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed”.

In short you experience your workplace as stressful and you are not able anymore to copy with the demands. It does not apply to other stressful experiences in your life.

If you can identify the symptoms early enough, you’ll increase your chances to tackle the underlying issue on time… and not to drift into an illness.

 

SilkCelia-Ovecome Exhaustion

1. Feeling of Energy Depletion and Exhaustion.

Burnout and depression share some of the same symptoms. Symptom means it is your own subjective experience. Your body feels depleted of energy and vitality. You feel as if your body is paralyzed.

What you experience

  • You wake up still tired though you went to bed early.
  • Climbing the stairs, preparing for work, taking in the grocery shopping or lifting up your kids takes more effort than you can afford.
  • You feel overwhelmed by the tasks ahead of you.

What you can do to overcome your exhaustion

1.Look at the time you’re spending at work and the time you’re actually performing at work. Create buffer zones to create space in your calendar to rewire and not to expire.

  • Apps like brain focus  can help you create focus and break times. You can adjust the focus time that best fits you. For example 25 min focus and 5 min break. In the break time make sure to do the opposite of what you were doing.
  • Great time breaks are: Breathing, Brain Fitness, Stretching, Mindfulness, and Lunch away from the desk. Or use this time to check on social media if necessary.

2. If you’re chasing deadlines instead of finishing them, scale back and set priorities. You can’t do everything at any time. Do a single to-do list for every day with things you must do.

3. You are not designed as a robot who can perform 24/7. Even a robot needs energy to perform. Though you may not follow a 9 to 5 job, the 8 hours work day and weekend were created for a reason. After work time is an important part for your inner balance and social connections.

4. Create a sleep ritual to get your body into sleeping mode. Detach from devices at least an hour before bed time. The bright light interferes with sleeping hormones that are released from your brain when it is becoming dark. Get in the rhythm of becoming more and more relaxed. Guided meditations and calm music can help.

SilkCelia-Reconnect To Your Workplace

2. Increased mental distance from one’s job.

It is natural that there are time that you don’t enjoy the work you do. However, if this feeling persists even when you are with friends and family, or just thinking about your work makes you feel miserable and you map out how you could escape your work, then this is a symptom of burnout.

What you experience

  • You’re calling in sick days on a regular basis.
  • You suspect that your colleagues, your boss or clients are against you and you become more irritable and less patient.
  • You do not attend company events or parties you were once looking forward to.

What you can do to overcome your distance

The most important thing is to find out, what is truly causing the stress at your work place.

  • Is it a conflict you have with your boss or colleague and it effects your work relationship?
  • Is it the new software you’re not understanding and you lack behind your work?
  • Is it the merging of departments and you fear to be sidelined or laid off?
  • Is it that you feel that you have to prove yourself  to be in your current position?

___________________________________________________

These are some guidelines for your self-reflection (adapted from Byron Katie):

  • In this current work situation, who/what angers, confuses, saddens, or pressures you and why?

Fill in the blanks: I am _____ with ______ because_____

  • In order to be happy in this situation what do you need them to think, say, feel or do?

Fill in the blanks: I want _____ to __________

  • What is it about the situation that you’ve never want to experience again?

Fill in the blanks: I don’t ever want to __________

___________________________________________________

Do this self-reflection to understand the deeper reasons of your burn-out. Only then you can find the right solution for your work situation.

If you need further help to find the underlying narrative of your distance to your work and how to solve it, book a 30-min discovery call with me now.

SilkCelia-Regain Control

3. Reduced Professional Efficiency

Once your burnout reaches a certain level, it will affect your work performance and your self-confidence. The nervous system has taken its toll on your stress response, your emotions and thoughts. You experience a mental burnout.

What you experience

  • Thoughts in your mind become louder and asking you: “What’s the point!”
  • You think this work is awful and it will always be like this.
  • You may start feeling hopeless, helpless and powerless.
  • You feel that the situation is not in your control, not predictable and you have no abilities to deal with it.
  • These symptoms can also manifest as a mental fatigue. You have difficulty concentrating at work and finish your daily tasks not to speak about getting done novel and complex problems.

What you can do to overcome your reduced professional efficiency

1.Make the part of your work you can control predictable. Take time as your precious gift and trade it for the things that bring you and your project forward. This means setting clear boundaries and reducing low value digital noise and optimize tools that benefit your work.

2. Focus on the positive. Burnout can occur because your focus is lost and misdirected to negative emotions and thoughts. Consider your daily thoughts and feelings. Are you focusing on the negative aspects of every situation?

How can you change this, so your thoughts are on a more positive path?

___________________________________________________

Do this short exercise from The Work by Byron Katie.

  1. What is your belief/thought concerning your work?
  2. Can you absolutely know it is true?
  3. Does this thought bring peace or stress into your life?
  4. What images or body sensation arise when you think of this thought?
  5. What are events in your life you felt similar?
  6. What feelings arise when you have this thought (e.g. anger, sadness, helpless, hopeless…)
  7. Who would you be without this thought?

___________________________________________________

You may want to create lists of positive actions and thoughts throughout the day to stay on track. You can keep a notebook of inspirational quotes to help you avoid negativity.

Summary

To increase your chances to prevent depression and recover from burn-out fast, take time to relax and follow this advice.

Find time to relax, trade your time as the most precious asset, reflect on the narratives of your work place situation and play with your negative thoughts. Understanding the underlying issue of your burnout will increase your chances to recover from burn-out and possibly make you more resilient in the future.

What insights are you taking away from this? And most importantly what are you going to put into action? Comment below.

How To Recover From Burnout in 4 Sessions

Click on this link >> to book a call with me and find out how you can leave burnout, anxiety and stress behind and increase your wellbeing and success.

Interested?  Let’s work together.

Consider how you came to be in this situation. Do you need to make some changes at work, a different job, or a more satisfying relationship? Could it help you to speak to a professional? What needs to happen to prevent the same situation from happening again?

My goal as an executive coach is to provide rapid and long-lasting changes for professionals who go through life changes or challenging situations resulting in burnout, stress and anxiety. No matter where you are in the world, the therapy sessions are held online. 4-Hours of my Elevate Intensive and you will improve the quality of your life, switch your body back to peace and balance, and gain clarity and focus.

I hold a master’s degree in psychology with an over 15-years career in counseling and coaching. I trained with a broad range of international experts like the world-renowned therapist and pioneering hypnotherapist Marisa Peer (Rapid Transformation Therapy Practitioner®), Rori Raye (Relationship Coaching), and Prof. Dr. Justin Kennedy (Applied Neuroscience Coaching).

Contact me today to learn how I can help make things better!  www.silkcelia.com

Like What Your Read? 

Register below and receive monthly advice!

Yes, sign me up for monthly newsletter emails from Silk Celia with highlights of her blog and vlog. For more information on how we use your information, check out our Privacy Policy. You can change your mind anytime by unsubscribing.

7 Ways How To Get Through a Business Meeting when you are depressed.

SilkCelia_Depression at work

"Cancel, cancel, cancel!" These words were on his mind when he went to re-schedule the business meeting.

Too many reasons; too exhausted and unfocused to do it; too many meetings to attend and all with new demands on his executive functioning.

What nobody knows that he could not functioning at all.

Some months ago depression had entered his life. It had started as a blues, then it had affected his mood, his thinking and vitality. Finally, he had reached a point to get the help he needed.

During one of our sessions he was wondering how to go through his business meetings: he couldn't focus for long, had problems organizing his thoughts and felt too weak to negotiate. "I feel like a beginner groping in the fog.", he described his inner world. "I'm powerless. I can no longer move the fog away and do what I used to do with ease."

Here are six proven ways that helped him and others to go through business meetings if you feel depressed or weak. They will help to control your emotions and thoughts.

 

SilkCelia_6Ps

Use these 6 proven strategies to go through a business meeting in control of your emotions and thoughts.

#1. Plan

Plan your breaks. Prioritize meetings and always plan daily short timeouts between appointments and tasks. So you will find enough time to regain energy. You can go outside for a short walk, or use the silence to think thing over or you can do some brain gym exercises to re-energize.

Consider delegation: If the meeting is not very important, ask your staff or colleagues to participate because of "overlapping appointment".

Put meetings in your best phases of the day. If your anxiety or depression is higher in early morning hours, perhaps schedule important meetings in the afternoon.

Be prepared. First identify your goal of the meeting and gather arguments supporting your goal. This will help you structure your thoughts before the meeting and will guide you through the meeting. Also include the other people in the meeting and their interests in your preparation to have good points in your hand. Make notes during the meeting and insist on writing the minutes by a meting member.

 

#2. PRESENT 

Focus on the discussion. Instead of drifting into your own thoughts that are often negative, try to listen to the input of others. Try this for one minute first. Whenever you drift to your own thoughts, notice it and go back to the present movement. Congratulate yourself for your effort. When answering, try to repeat what you heard and understood. So you can not only structure your own, but you also impress others as a great  listener and conversation partner - people always appreciate this behavior.

Grab the table. If you feel weak and overwhelmed, grab the table or a pen and be fully aware of this feeling: "How is the table/pen feeling in your hands?" "How is the surface feeling?" "Does it have some rough edges?" Do this intensive but silent observation for 10 sec or one minute. This will provide you with a sense of control.

 

#3. POSTURE 

Change your posture. When you feel depressed or anxious, your body posture will show this. Your shoulders may be rolled forward, your back may be bent, you may look downward. Realize this and simply strengthen your body. Whenever you get more height and space in your posture and stance you will increase your energy level and decrease your stress level. Sit upright, expand your chest and roll your shoulders back. Feel your buttocks firmly on the chair and slightly lean forward. Try to make wide gestures. This will bring you back in a position of power and energy. Form your hands as a triangle to get a strong feeling in your hands.

 

#4. PRENTEND

Change your look. If it is hard for you to change your feelings, pretend another alter ego. Wear your "pink" glasses for example by wearing special glasses for important business meetings that let you look competent and strong. The same effect may have certain clothes. Use them like a prop for your energized and vital self. You can also put your watch from the left to the right wrist before the meeting. The right hand is associated to masculine, planning and thinking energy. You will literally program yourself to this more useful energy.

 

#5. PLANT

Root yourself as a tree. On some days you may feel too unstable and weak for a meeting. If you root yourself into the ground, no emotional turmoil will harm you. Imagine yourself as a tree with roots going from your 'trank'  into the ground, through the concrete deep into the soil. And then all the nutrients are coming up from the soil through your roots into your body, your legs and torso, into your arms and hands, your shoulders into your head. Now feel every cell of your body getting stabilized. If you prefer a spiritual connection, imagine white light shining on you. I experienced this powerful technique from Rori Raye.

 

#6. POSITIVE

Observe your thoughts. Though you have all these worries and emotions inside you, you can still act despite them. If however, you are getting swept away by thoughts like "I am not able to hold this meeting", "I am to weak" or "I am not myself" you better step back and become aware of your thoughts without evaluating them.

I'm simply having the thought. One easy technique from Russ Harris is to simply replay your negative thought with this phrase: "I'm having the thought that..." for example, that I'm too weak.

Allow your thoughts to come and go like clouds or water passing by. Do not judge them, let them simply come and go. One thought after thought will appear and disappear. This method will help you recognize that your thoughts are always present in your mind but that cannot interfere your actions and words in the meeting.

 

Now it's your choice to test two or three of these tips. There will be no change if you always do the same actions in the hope that the results will eventually come.

What is your favorite tool? Do you have another tip for us? Leave your feedback in the comments.

How To Recover From Burnout in 4 Sessions

Click on this link >> to book a call with me and find out how you can leave burnout, anxiety and stress behind and increase your wellbeing and success.

Interested?  Let’s work together.

Consider how you came to be in this situation. Do you need to make some changes at work, a different job, or a more satisfying relationship? Could it help you to speak to a professional? What needs to happen to prevent the same situation from happening again?

My goal as an executive coach is to provide rapid and long-lasting changes for professionals who go through life changes or challenging situations resulting in burnout, stress and anxiety. No matter where you are in the world, the therapy sessions are held online. 4-Hours of my Elevate Intensive and you will improve the quality of your life, switch your body back to peace and balance, and gain clarity and focus.

I hold a master’s degree in psychology with an over 15-years career in counseling and coaching. I trained with a broad range of international experts like the world-renowned therapist and pioneering hypnotherapist Marisa Peer (Rapid Transformation Therapy Practitioner®), Rori Raye (Relationship Coaching), and Prof. Dr. Justin Kennedy (Applied Neuroscience Coaching).

Contact me today to learn how I can help make things better!  www.silkcelia.com

Like What Your Read? 

Register below and receive monthly advice!

Yes, sign me up for monthly newsletter emails from Silk Celia with highlights of her blog and vlog. For more information on how we use your information, check out our Privacy Policy. You can change your mind anytime by unsubscribing.

#6 Do-It-Yourself Strategies To Manage Stress and Burnout.

lucas-clara-579404-unsplash

Burnout has become a buzz word in recent years. It is put on the agenda by many organizations facing a downward spiral in individual and organizational performance. Or leaders use 'burnout' to whitewash a depression or anxiety.

A Gallup study in 2018 found that 23% of 7,500 full-time employees reported feeling burned out at work very often or always, while 44% reported feeling burned out sometimes.

According to the study burned-out employees are 63% more likely to take a sick day and 2.6 times as likely to be actively seeking a different job. And even if they stay, they typically have 13% lower confidence in their performance and are half as likely to discuss how to approach performance goals with their managers.

A study by NeuroBusiness Group in 2013 asked US senior managers and C-Suite executives about the impression of burnout within their organization. 80.55% of them reported that they were burned out: 47.22% responded somewhat, and 33.33% responded “very much”- the two highest categories.

The World Health Organization describes in its International Classification of Diseases (ICD-11) Burn-Out as a syndrome resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed.

Modern work-places come with a lot of challenges for employees and leaders: work overload, lack of communication and support, time pressure, lack of clarity, work-life balance, and the list can go on and on.

Of course, the most important step in improving office wellbeing involves taking a closer look what Gallup recommends for better management to reduce burn out.

Although some people find ways to “make it work” and cope with the stressors, many struggle. This is particularly true for people who feel overwhelmed and have not invested in their own mental and emotional resilience and wellbeing. Luckily, there are many ways to accomplish this.

 

SilkCelia_Snease

Use these 6 proven tips to overcome and prevent burnout and other stress related disorders.

 

#1. SLEEP 

You may need more than you think. Sometimes, the best option is to call it a night a couple of hours earlier than normal and get some extra rest. The recommended sleeping time from the National Sleep Foundation is for adults 7 to 9 hours of continuous night sleep.

Make sleep a priority and do not listen to people announcing that they can stay brilliant all day long with only 4 hours of sleep and  the right supplements. Your body undergoes four to five sleep cycles per night, each consisting of light sleep, deep sleep and REM sleep. They all have their function in your mental and physical recovery.

The National Sleep Foundation recommends you practice a relaxing bedtime ritual and evaluate your bedroom: cool temperature, free from noise (consider using ear plugs), free from any light (consider blackout curtains, eye shades) and comfortable mattress and pillows. Avoid using electronics before bedtime and switch off your wifi.

If your sleep cycle has been interrupted for a couple of weeks, please seek medical help to find the underlying issue.

 

 

#2. NUTRITION 

Clean up your diet. When you’re feeling burned out, it can help to eat a healthier diet. Junk food creates more stress and load for your body to deal with. Cutting back on your calories and providing quality nutrition to your body can make a positive difference.

Avoid caffeine and sugar. They are the last things you need if you’re feeling frazzled. They stimulate your body and your mind. They can create more challenges than it solves. It is essential for your brain cells to get good fats from oily fish, nuts and seeds during times of stress.

The brain and gut are connected. You may experienced that a certain situation made you "feel nauseous"? Anger, anxiety, stress, sadness - all of these feelings can trigger symptoms in the gut. Super gut-soothing foods are Sauerkraut ("sour white cabbage"), Asparagus, Aloe Vera Gel, Pineapple, Onion, Garlic, and Kimchi.

 

 

#3. EMOTIONAL CONTROL 

Train your mental state. Follow Tony Robbin’s advice. Change your state by changing your posture, your focus and your language even if you have to force yourself. Whenever you use more height and space in your posture and stance you increase your energy level and decrease your stress level.  Focus on the aspects of your work you enjoy and mentally choose that you are in control and that you are great, amazing, inspiring, a one of a kind. Do not wait for others to see your greatness. If you see it in yourself and appreciate yourself, others will see it too. This is at least my experience.

Meditate. Meditation, listening to relaxing music, praying, or anything else that relaxes your mind can be beneficial. Avoid ruminating over the challenges in your life. Your brain doesn’t get a break unless you create one.

Laugh. Laughing will always make you feel better. Who’s your funniest friend? What’s the funniest movie you’ve ever seen? How can you make yourself laugh? A night of laughter will give you a mental reset and put you in a better position to handle the challenges in your life.

 

 

#4. ACTIVITY

Create a strong contrast between work and home life. If you spend your day quietly writing and planning, you might want to exercise and invite some friends over in the evening.  If your day is busy with meetings and talking with people, you may want to go for long walk or follow your favorite solo hobby after work. With this you balance out different regions of the brain (logic and creative, sedative and active).

You can even release stress, expend excess energy and enhance performance during your day with brain gym exercises. They are designed to engage your full brain.

Maintain  a diverse practice of exercises to benefit your brain: aerobic exercises (boost the number of blood vessels and synapsis in the brain), resistance training and mind-body exercise. Listen to what your body needs.

Commit to at least 15-min a day. Especially when you feel tired and exhausted you may not be able to run for an hour or face the gym. Accept your feelings and be flexible. One day you may go for a brisk walk, another day to may follow a yoga session on youtube etc.

 

 

#5. SOCIAL INTERACTIONS

Spend time with people you genuinely like. This has been shown to be one of the best ways to recover from mental burnout and other stress related disorders. Spending time with someone (family or friend) who makes you smile and feel relaxed can be the best medicine. It creates a form of bonding that in return releases the hormone oxytosin.

Humans are socially programmed to live in groups. The late US scientist Prof. John T. Cacioppo studied the effects of loneliness. When you are alone you are more sensitive to your environment and perceive it as potentially more dangerous putting you under even more stress. The best way for you to gain trust and confidence again is to practice seeing the world in a relaxed and open way. Want to feel instantly better? Then do something good for other people... visiting elderly people, take up a role in a club, mentoring other people, etc.

 

 

#6. ENTHUSIASM

Find something greater than yourself (passion). Reconnect with your why to renew your motivation. You may discover multiple sources of gratification, including supporting your family and contributing to society.

To explore your why ask yourself: "What do I do my whole life with ease?" "What is the most common dominator of all these experiences?" "What is my effect on other people?" "What other people ask me for?" "What choices do I make and what do I express with that?"

Live a life based on values than achieving goals. Values are like a compass that guides you through your life. Connect with your highest values by asking yourself: "What is important for me when I am acting in line with my passion?"

 

Source:

  1. https://www.gallup.com/workplace/237059/employee-burnout-part-main-causes.aspx
    Employee Burnout, Part 1: The 5 Main Causes, Gallup Workplace, by Ben Wigert and Sangeeta Agrawal
  2. https://arielle.com.au/c-suite-burnout-survey-summary
    C-Suite Burnout Survey 2013, Steven McConnell, August 27, 2013

WORK-LIFE BALANCE ASSESSMENT

 

Maintaining a healthy work-life balance protects you from burnout and increases your productivity. Setting reasonable boundaries gives you time and energy to devote to your relationships and other personal activities.

However, busy schedules and modern technology can make it difficult to disconnect at the end of the workday unless you develop habits that help you to be fully present at home.

A) Rate how much you agree with the following statements on a scale of 1 (least) to 5 (most).

B) Then, identify small changes that will help you to reduce stress and take care of each important aspect of your life.

 

1. I feel like I’m neglecting my responsibilities at home or work.

(Example: Rating 2. I will set realistic goals and give myself credit for my efforts and accomplishments.)

1 (Strongly Disagree) 5 (Strongly Agree)

 

2. I ask others for help when I need it.

(Example: Rating 4. I will assign my children household chores appropriate for their ages.)

1 (Strongly Disagree) 5 (Strongly Agree)

 

3. My priorities are clear.

(Example: Rating 4. I will plan my day each morning and block out hours for my most urgent and important tasks.)

1 (Strongly Disagree) 5 (Strongly Agree)

 

4. I manage workplace stress effectively.

(Example: Rating 3. I will stretch or go for a walk when I feel tense.)

1 (Strongly Disagree) 5 (Strongly Agree)

 

5. I avoid excessive overtime.

(Example: Rating 4. I will schedule challenging tasks for the hours when I am at peak performance so I won’t have to stay late to complete them.)

1 (Strongly Disagree) 5 (Strongly Agree)

 

How To Recover From Burnout in 4 Sessions

Click on this link >> to book a call with me and find out how you can leave burnout, anxiety and stress behind and increase your wellbeing and success.

Interested?  Let’s work together.

Consider how you came to be in this situation. Do you need to make some changes at work, a different job, or a more satisfying relationship? Could it help you to speak to a professional? What needs to happen to prevent the same situation from happening again?

My goal as an executive coach is to provide rapid and long-lasting changes for professionals who go through life changes or challenging situations resulting in burnout, stress and anxiety. No matter where you are in the world, the therapy sessions are held online. 4-Hours of my Elevate Intensive and you will improve the quality of your life, switch your body back to peace and balance, and gain clarity and focus.

I hold a master’s degree in psychology with an over 15-years career in counseling and coaching. I trained with a broad range of international experts like the world-renowned therapist and pioneering hypnotherapist Marisa Peer (Rapid Transformation Therapy Practitioner®), Rori Raye (Relationship Coaching) and Prof. Dr. Justin Kennedy (Applied Neuroscience Coaching).

Contact me today to learn how I can help make things better!  www.silkcelia.com

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How To Improve Your Self-Confidence in 9 Effective Ways.

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I remember a situation at work when my boss – a 65 year old Tin-Tin, rushed into my office and blurred at me: “I am paying you a lot of money. You are the psychologist here.  We lost the proposal because of you. The way you put it together! So unprofessional!”

I felt between angry and helpless. The way you feel when someone blames you for things you are not responsible for but want to push it on to you?

So I rushed up from my chair and responded: “If I had been so bad, why I got always very good in the audits of the last of 5 years?”

Inside I felt very vulnerabel, but could I have shown this to my boss and lay down? In this fight-flight-freeze situation?

I had to defend myself. I had to show my abilities and confidence in them. The alternative would had been anxiety and freezing or running away.

After the meeting I felt drained and exhausted. I looked for my mistakes!
Was it the documents I put? Was it the handling of the case?

Then it stroke me:

I know that I am not a legal expert!

I know that I get easily defensive when people question my abilities.

I know that I wanted to leave that company much ealier and still stayed.

I know that I am good in therapy and healing.

Accepting who I am, with my your shortcomings, character, strengths, habits, and tendencies. shifted my inner state.

Accepting yourself is a process. It’s a habit. The little things you do, or fail to do, each day determine your level of self-acceptance. Developing these useful habits and dropping the negative habits is a huge step in the right direction. It’s hard to accept yourself any other way.

Be accepting of  yourself each and every day by making these actions habits:

 

  1. Let go of your mistakes and failures. Take the necessary time to learn from your negative experiences. Once you’ve done that, there’s nothing else to be gained by them. Let them go.

○      Decide how you can avoid making the same error in the future. Then move on.

  1. Only compare yourself to yourself. Comparing yourself to someone else is like comparing a tree to a loaf of bread. There’s no comparison. However, you can compare yourself to your previous results.

○      If you’re doing “better,” you have every right to be excited.

○      If you’re coming up short, be excited that you know you can easily rectify the situation.

  1. Separate yourself from your emotions. Your emotions are separate from you. They are something that you’re experiencing, just like someone stepping on your toe. Observe them as a feeling in your body, or as a piece of paper blowing down the street. Just observe them.

○      A piece of paper blowing by doesn’t have any control over you. Your emotions don't have to control you either.

  1. Be aware of what makes you unique and embrace it. It might be your flaming red hair, your incredible IQ, or your compassion for animals. Maybe you’re in the bottom 5th percentile for height. You’re not exactly the same as anyone else.

○      It’s your uniqueness that potentially provides the most value to you and the world.

  1. Let go of the things you can’t change or control. You’re not accepting of your life or your limitations if you worry about those things beyond your influence.

○      Ask yourself, “Is there anything I can do about this?” If not, there’s no reason to dwell on it.

  1. Do something that you’ve always wanted to do. Avoid denying your impulses. If you’ve always want to learn how to play the bagpipes or write a sappy screenplay, now is the time. When you deny your healthy impulses, you’re not accepting yourself.
  2. Be more assertive. Let people know what you think. Give your opinion. Allow your voice to be heard. Do the things you want to do. Assertiveness is a form of honesty - about you and your own desires.
  3. Recognize your thoughts and feelings. Examine your self-talk. Stand in front of a full-length mirror and take a good look at yourself. Notice your thoughts throughout the day. Acknowledge how you judge yourself.

○      Most people distract themselves with TV, the internet, food, their smartphone, or some other strategy. This is to avoid spending time with themselves. Turn off the distractions and notice what happens.

  1. Continue evolving. Those with little self-acceptance tend to be stuck. They can’t move toward anything positive. Be honest with yourself about what you like and dislike and allow your life to evolve.

Treat each day as a new opportunity to practice self-acceptance. You must choose self-acceptance if you want to experience it firsthand. It won’t happen by accident. Develop self-acceptance habits and drop your tendency to judge yourself harshly. Free yourself from your emotions.

 

“I think happiness comes from self-acceptance. We all try different things, and we find some comfortable sense of who we are. We look at our parents and learn and grow and move on. We change.”

– Jamie Lee Curtis

 

For coaching, workshops and speaking. Please feel free to contact me here:  silkcelia.com

 

Silke Glaab (aka >>SilkCelia) is a Human Behavior Expert for Executives and Entrepreneurs to Make Profound Life & Career Changes in 4 hours by using super learning tools like Hypnotherapy, Systemic Work and Theta Healing.
Silk holds a master degree in psychology and has worked for over 20 years as a trainer, consultant and counselor in diverse industries in Germany, Kenya, and Dubai. She is personally trained by the celebrity hypnotherapist Marisa Peer and the neuroscientist Prof. Dr. Kennedy.

 

How To Create Abundance from Scarcity in 8 Steps.

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Most people live with a scarcity mindset. In certain parts of the world, the population has a good reason to feel this way. There is a shortage of food, clean water, and housing in much of the world. Much of our scarcity thinking is driven by advertisers and the media in general. We are encouraged to consume and achieve more.

 

Even when we have enough, we’re told that we need a better car, better clothes, or a higher income to be successful and impress the neighbors. It’s no wonder we feel like there isn’t enough for everyone.

 

Move your mindset from one of scarcity to one of abundance with these strategies:

 

  1. Those with a scarcity mindset have a very short-term perspective. If you regularly find yourself only concerned with entertaining yourself as much as possible each moment, you might have a scarcity mindset. The utilization of resources right now prevents them from being taken away later.
  • Overeating and overspending can be symptoms of a scarcity mindset. “Better eat it or spend it now before it’s gone” is poor way to view the world.
  1. Focus on what you already have. You might already have enough to have a grateful and positive mindset. When you see that you have enough, you won’t be worried about losing it. You have plenty.
  2. Avoid people that complain a lot. Complainers have a scarcity mindset. You’re more susceptible to the mindset of others than you think. Find positive people to include in your social circle. There are so many people in the world, why spend time with those that make your life harder?
  3. Focus on what you can have in the future. Instead of worrying about what you might lose, spend some time thinking about what you can gain in the future. Look forward to the future rather than fear it.
  • Visualize an exciting future. Develop positive feelings about the future. Isn’t that the foundation of an abundance mindset?
  1. Avoid wasting time. By taking part in frivolous activities, you waste your most valuable resource – your time. Value your time and you’ll have more of it.
  2. Keep a journal. Keep it positive. List the things in your life that make you feel grateful. Be sure to mention all the people in your life. You probably have a home, a job, a car, family, friends, and so on. That’s a good start to a wonderful life.
  3. Get organized. Getting organized can greatly hasten your move from a scarcity mindset to an abundance mindset. Organize your closet, garage, or attic. You’ll be surprised by how many things you own. Getting organized will also free up more time. When you realize that you have more things and time than you thought, you’ll think more abundantly.
  4. Be generous. Convince yourself that there is enough for everyone by sharing what you have. The more you’re willing to share, the more others are willing to share with you. That includes sharing your time.

 

One of the primary steps to having more is believing that there is enough for everyone. When you have a scarcity mindset, you become defensive and protective. You also create the false belief that everything will be a greater challenge than it is. When you imagine that something is difficult, you’re more likely to procrastinate or discourage yourself altogether.

 

An abundance mindset won’t magically place a Mercedes in your garage or add few zeros to your bank account. However, an abundance mindset will allow you to enthusiastically take the necessary steps to make these types of changes in your life.

 

For coaching, workshops and speaking. Please feel free to contact me here:  silkcelia.com

 

Silke Glaab (aka >>SilkCelia) is a Human Behaviour Expert for Executives and Entrepreneurs to make profound professional and personal changes in 4 hours by using super learning tools like Hypnotherapy and Systemic Work.
Silk holds a master degree in psychology and has worked for over 20 years as a trainer, consultant and counselor in diverse industries in Germany, Kenya, and Dubai. She is personally trained by the celebrity hypnotherapist Marisa Peer and the neuroscientist Prof. Dr. Kennedy.

 

How To Find Your True Self: 7 Ways To Reveal it.

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How To Find Your True Self

 

Your true self is the part of you that is constant. It transcends your body, emotions, and experiences. It is the essence of you.

How would you describe yourself? You might declare that you are Susan, wife of Bob, a pharmaceutical sales rep, and have Scottish ancestry.

However, if you had been named Beth, married a guy named Steve, worked as a nurse and had Irish ancestors, you would still be the same person you are now. Your life and experiences might be different, but you would still be fundamentally the same person.

There’s something about you that’s constant, though it’s hard to describe exactly what that is.

Who are you?

One thing is for certain: when you’re living a life that aligns with your true self, you’re going to be happy. If you’re not living a life that resonates with your true self, you’ll feel like something is lacking. It doesn’t matter how much success, fortune, and fame you achieve if your true self isn’t honored.

Try these ideas to discover your true self and reveal your path in life:

  1. What is your level of introversion / extroversion? Do you feel more energized and comfortable when alone or with others? When are you at your best?
  • If you’re naturally introverted, a job that requires interacting with people all day long is going to create a lot of stress and anxiety.
  • Spending time alone in a cubicle working on a computer might drive you crazy if you’re extroverted.
  1. What did you like as a child that you still like today? It might be baseball, Scooby-Doo cartoons, pizza, and afternoon naps. Dig deeper than that. You might find that you’ve always craved adventure, creativity, and helping others. Think about the characteristics and qualities in your life that have been constant.
  2. If you could accomplish anything, what do you think would be your greatest accomplishment? Is it earning a billion dollars or winning a Nobel Peace Prize? Maybe it’s writing a best-selling book or adopting a disadvantaged child. What do you think is the greatest accomplishment a person can have?
  3. What do you consider to be the most important lessons you could teach a child? What do you wish you had known when you were 10-20 years of age? What could you have known that would have made your life more meaningful?
  4. What would you do with great wealth? After you bought a mansion and a fancy car, what would you do with your life? What would you do with your free time and extensive financial resources?
  5. Who are your heroes? Albert Einstein? John D. Rockefeller? Mother Teresa? Whom do you look up to? Why? Whose life would you most like to emulate? Whom would you be most proud to be like?
  6. Think about who you have been. Sometimes we get too caught up in who we want to be and ignore who we are. You might dream of being a Rockstar, but can’t carry a tune, can’t play an instrument, and suffer from panic attacks when faced with an audience. We all have to accept our limitations.
  • It’s important to make the most of your life but be realistic about who you are.
  • What are your natural strengths and weaknesses? Likes and dislikes?

You can’t create your true self. You can only discover, acknowledge, and accept it.

Whatever your true self might be, you can be sure that it’s spectacular. It’s your job to reveal it to yourself and then honor it. Run with your interests and strengths. Avoid worrying about your dislikes and weaknesses. Honor yourself and enjoy your life.

 

For coaching, workshops and speaking. Please feel free to contact me here:  silkcelia.com

 

Silke Glaab (aka >>SilkCelia) is a Rapid Transformation Coach for Executives and Entrepreneurs to Make Profound Life & Career Changes in 4 hours by using super learning tools like Hypnotherapy, Systemic Work and Theta Healing.
Silk holds a master degree in psychology and has worked for over 20 years as a trainer, consultant and counselor in diverse industries in Germany, Kenya, and Dubai. She is personally trained by the celebrity hypnotherapist Marisa Peer and the neuroscientist Prof. Dr. Kennedy.

 

Career Crossroad: 4 Tips To Choose Right

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"Shall I stay in my comfort with my benefits or quit and change my career?, a client I coach - a doctor in the pharmaceutical industry, asked me.

"I am at a crossroad of my career and have to make the right decision! Is it really worth starting again and trying something new"

Making a career choice and sticking to it is not as easy as it sounds, especially in today’s economic climate. It can be nerve-wracking to go through the process of choosing a path, especially when you’re not sure if it’ll take you to a long-lived career.

So how do you know which path to take? How can you be sure that going in a certain direction is the absolute best thing to do?

 

Consider these thought processes to help you make the career choice that's right for you:

 

  1. Believe in the worth of your efforts. Only you know how much work and effort you’ve put into making yourself ready for the ideal career. And, as the saying goes, “You get out what you put in.” If you are genuinely satisfied that you’ve made the most thorough preparations, then pat yourself on the back and go for it!
  • Consider how your achievements measure up to others in positions similar to the one you want to be in.
  • Determine if the success you’ve achieved has equipped you to take the path you most want to take.
  • Trust that you’re good enough for it!

 

  1. Know your career goals. One of the most significant aspects of choosing the right career path is determining what you want to achieve from it. Take a look at the options in front of you. How well do they measure up to your goals?
  • Do you see yourself becoming the CFO in the Northwest if you choose Option 1?
  • Will the recognition you desire be forthcoming after two years working in Option 2?
  • Can you safely say either option will allow you to reap the financial rewards you’re aiming for?

 

  1. Do it for all the right reasons. When chasing success, it’s very easy to get sidetracked by all the frills that seem to come with it. In fact, you may even lose sight of why you’re chasing a particular goal! Why would you choose a particular path? Is it to fit in with peers? Is it to prove to naysayers that you actually have what it takes?
  • Always choose the path that makes you happy and gives you pride in your achievement.
  • Make choices that work out best for you and your family; forget those people on the outside looking in.

 

  1. Never compromise your beliefs. Above all, what’s ultimately important when at a professional crossroads is sticking to what you believe in. It can be really tempting to jump at an offer that seems to have everything you ever wanted, with the “small” exception that you have to step on toes to get to the top!
  • If you believe there’s a right way to achieve the professional success you want, stick to it!
  • Usually, the choices that are the hardest to make are the best ones to make. It might not seem lucrative now, but you’ll never know what’s around the corner!

 

Remember that all that glitters isn’t gold! Sometimes the best road is the roughest road because at the end of it will be all the goals and successes you always dreamed of. Always remember to stay true to yourself and your goals; success is inevitable if you do!

 

For coaching, workshops and speaking. Please feel free to contact me here:  silkcelia.com

 

Silke Glaab (aka >>SilkCelia) is a Rapid Transformation Coach for Executives and Entrepreneurs to Make Profound Life & Career Changes in 4 hours by using super learning tools like Hypnotherapy, Systemic Work and Theta Healing.
Silk holds a master degree in psychology and has worked for over 20 years as a trainer, consultant and counselor in diverse industries in Germany, Kenya, and Dubai. She is personally trained by the celebrity hypnotherapist Marisa Peer and the neuroscientist Prof. Dr. Kennedy.

 

Depression: The Dark Side of Entrepreneurship

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Entrepreneurship and Depression

Entrepreneur depression is a fact, but not often talked about. The pressure to succeed and the fear of failure makes many people running ambitious businesses afraid to ask for help.

Maybe you relate to the story of Andrew and the symptoms he shows.

Find out about a survey done in 2010 among entrepreneurs by Michael E. Freeman at al., which brought some unexpected mental health issue to light.

For those who recognize the symptoms, find practical help how to face your depression.

Pease scroll down for the transcript of the video.

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Depression: The Dark Side of Entrepreneurship

 

Let me tell you about Andrew.

You may know someone like him.

He left his corporate job and went into the start-up world with a big idea.

He said he would become the number one motivational speaker and coach.

Thousands of followers… but not many paying clients.

Thousands of sold books and seats…. after a huge advertisement campaign.

Everybody thought Andrew is successful, yet his liabilities were above his assets.

Everybody saw him as confident and persuasive. Himself he had convinced that he’s not enough.

From the outside he was energetic, but felt irritable and weak most of the time.

He painted a colorful future for others, but his own picture was black and blank.

He traveled the world, but felt more disconnected and couldn’t enjoy it like before.

His life was moving him instead him moving.

 

We think entrepreneurship is

Freedom, but all responsibilities are on you.

It is working on your terms for long hours without break.

You can land a big deal, but live with chronic uncertainty to get the next one sealed.

You can work from anywhere, but your work is every time.

You can be profitable one day, but it takes time to lift off.

You fail and grieve like the loss of a loved one.

 

An online survey based on self-reports of 242 entrepreneurs by Michael E. Freeman et al in 2010 revealed that 72% reported a mental health concern (significant higher than the comparison group). 30% reported a life time history of depression, 29% ADHD and 27% anxiety. Compared to the National Centre of Health Statistics 7% of Americans were identified with depression.

 

It’s okay to work hard on your business, but nourish your brain with enough sleep, good nutrition and exercise.

It’s okay not to be strong and efficient, so find the right counselor or therapist to express your feelings and thoughts in a confidential setting to find ways to cope with stress and failure.

It’s okay to hide your issues from the public, so find the right community to chat with supportive people who have overcome similar issues and who listen to you without judgement.

It’s okay not to know it all, so find a mentor who has proven to build a profitable business.

You cannot do it all alone, so delegate or outsource things which are draining your energy to team members.

As you take salary out of your business, take time out of your week to unwind yourself.

First and foremost, a start-up puts you on an emotional rollercoaster unlike anything you have ever experienced. - Marc Andreessen

 

For coaching, workshops and speaking. Please feel free to contact me here:  silkcelia.com

Silke Glaab (aka SilkCelia) is a psychologist (MA) who helps executives, entrepreneurs and experts to be more resilient to stress and dramatically improve their thinking and feeling so that they enhance their performance and leave a legacy in their companies, their lives and the world.

 

Silk uses rapid transformation therapy to help clients to transform the roots of a presented issue within minutes while using neuroscience to boost brain power and emotional intelligence to create mindful behavior and decision making in all areas of life.

Silk holds a master degree in psychology and has worked for over 20 years as a trainer, consultant and counselor in diverse industries in Germany, Kenya, and Dubai. She is personally trained by the celebrity hypnotherapist Marisa Peer and the neuroscientist Prof. Dr. Kennedy.

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